Alright then. Enough of the doom and gloom. It's going to be a long long week to Sunday, and we'll have enough time to get even more bitter, sarcastic, caustic and generally pissed off.
Of all the things to make me feel better, provide a little bit of mirth and unadulterated sniggers, what better than to take a peek into the private lives of John Terry, his missus, Wayne Bridge, his ex-WAG, the England team and the Man Citeh team.
I know the tabloid press are going wild on the story, but I suppose I could summarise the situation as such:
Cap'n Fantastic and poor Wayne were once best friends.
Best friends at Chelski.
Even hung around together on holidays.
With the family.
Cap'n Fantastic took a fancy to Wayne's
underwear model French WAG.
Had her twice a week for four months.
Presumably after training.
But if it was after training, where was Wayne?
Never mind.
So Wayne is shattered, Cap'n Fantastic begs for forgiveness.
The England team and the FA are now involved,
wondering what to do with the "Cap'n" bit of Cap'n Fantastic.
Over at Eastlands, bozos are wearing "Team Bridge" shirts.
Wonder how many secretly had wished they'd done the same.
Back to real life then, and you do have to wonder: it's damn hilarious, and a right joke that Cap'n Fantastic did the deed. Must be all the crying that endears him to these chicks as a real sensitive new-age kind of man. So next time, when we have Citeh v Chelski, send them on, I say, and let Wayne sort it out with ole JT. If it were the French, say at...PSG, they'd be wondering what the fuss was all about. Happens all the time, and in the showers and locker rooms, I'll bet.
It's gotten to such comic dimensions that Ancelotti has supposedly appealed to his team for focus. I suppose there must be some degree of concern now, with dudes wondering just what was up when JT had to call in sick during training sessions. Definitely need some focus there. I can just imagine Arsely Hole saying: "That's it, boss. I'm NOT going for any damn away game when the Cap'n ain't in the squad!"
On the other hand, of course, Cap'n Fantastic's after-training exercises could go some way in uniting the locker room too, with good 'ole slaps on the back, and man-to-man handshakes with a tinge of jealousy and congratulations for a job well done. Who knows.
Alrighty. Tonight Chelski will play their game in hand. With or without Cap'n Fantastic? But whatever the case, they win against a dismal Hull, and they'll be 8 clear all over again. Looks like I'll be rooting for Hull tonight. Somehow, that gives me yet another loser-ish feeling which I could do without.
No comments:
Post a Comment