And I'm rewarded by some rather spiffy news from Manchester.
Looks like ole Wayne wants out. Yessiree. I've heard it said that fact is oftentimes stranger than fiction, and who can disagree. The carnal misadventures, the distractions, the boss getting pissed off, the abject form, the mysterious ankle injury, and now the news that he wants out - AND that Manchester City is a possible destination.
I mean, I'm thankful. Just when Arsenal's going through a dodgy patch, what better than Liverpool and Man U imploding in their own way just to keep things amusing. Cheers, mates.
So it seems Naughty Wayne and Sir have fallen out. Sounds like an "irreconcilable differences" kinda argument. You know, something like:
"Wayne. You horny piece of s__t. I thought we made it clear. After you f__ed around with that whore all those years ago..."
"F off, Alex."
"It's Sir to you."
"F off, Sir."
"Keep your thing in your jock strap, your boots on your feet, and play some bloody proper football once in a while, eh?"
"F off, Sir."
"What the hell's wrong with you? Can't bloody play any proper football without first getting it off for 50 quid? Bloody piece of..."
"F off, Sir."
"You're injured; and get out of my sight."
"No I'm not."
"Yes you are."
"No I'm not, and I'm off to Eastlands. You, my wife, all you shits the same...what's bloody wrong with a screw for 20 quid now and then? It's not like I'm stealing. And what do you care what I do after training?? Now piss off."
So endeth that beautiful thing that existed between England's boy wonder, that boyhood Everton fan, in England's #1 team. All in a steaming pile of turd. I suppose we should be glad all we ever had to deal with was Adebayor. And Barca. I say to all me Man U-supporting friends. Just be glad. He was too damn ugly for the Man U shirt anyways. Damn Shrek should not be playing football too.
All said and done, he'll probably stay through the season.
Who the hell's gonna pay top dollar for a cup-tied, fat, ugly, balding Englishman? Especially when they've got Ronaldo - that steamy, dreamy, bulgy-6 packed toy-boy from Madeira?
Oh yeah, I forgot. Manciti.
On the Arse front, looks like Birmingham are crying over getting bullied at the playground. Ah. Whatever. Get over it, why don't you. Let's see you really cry when you get to Ewood Park or Molineux. Twits.
News too is that poor ole Vito's off to Hull on loan till January. Must hurt falling back in line behind Fabianski, Almunia and Szcecscesccszny. But I think it'll do him good. You see, this is what's gonna happen: (a) Fabianski's going to have a decent so-so run of games, (b) Almunia will fall back to #2 and warm his hands in the Carling and FA Cups, and (c) Szcecscesccszny starts complaining to the Polish press and any damn lousy blog (like this) which will listen.
End of season, and Almunia leaves. Fabianski creeps up the pecking order, and Szcecscesccszny gets pissed off too, and leaves. Which leaves Vito. Comes back from Hull. Watches Fabianski start mucking it up again. And there he is. Last man standing. Don Mannone. He's taken care of the competition.
Alright then. Going to head back off to the second half of Blackburn-Sunderland. I must say, compared to England-Montenegro, France-Luxembourg, blah blah blah, it's really riveting stuff!
Ciao.
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