First, the Brazil-Portugal game played out as all the cynics would've expected. It was a shame the tie had to take place right at the end, when in all reality both would have no need to do anything other than show up. I mean, Brazil even trotted out Julio Baptista - not sure if there might be a weaker statement of intent.
Anyhows, nothing happened, and I spent much of the game thinking about "simulations". I like that word. Really do. It's used all the time, except when normal people talk. "What the shit are you doing? Simulating??!! Huh?? Tell me, was that a bloody simulation, you damn simulator??!! That's disgusting simulation!"
There was some minute prospect of excitement in the other game - where the Ivory Coast had to chuck in as many goals as the North Koreans would allow. Two goals in 20-odd minutes gave us some hope of excitement. But no, damp squib there too. 3-0. Oh well. The only thing of note would be that North Korea can go home proud. One goal, against Brazil no less.
Anyway, I digress. We all know what simulation is in FIFA-speak. But, having watched Tiago simulate in the penalty box first half of the game, and then rightly get a yellow card, I was left wondering why there's no similar sanction for anyone who simulates injury (especially facial injury) in a blatant attempt to get someone sent off. If a guy clutches his face in writhing agony one second, then gets up the next with nary a stratch, would that not be simulation - if ever there's better illustration of what the damn word means??
Ahhh....not going to overly "simulate" myself over this.
On to the evening's games. Better prospects for excitement, surely. Not. Let me get Switzerland out of the way first.
Switzerland. Conquerors of mighty Spain. Top of the table after one game. 3 points, 1 goal. But that's how it would ever after two more games. What a let down. Even I was celebrating, expectant and even somehow vaguely proud to be in Switzerland to witness it all.
Considered getting a Swiss shirt. Thank god Puma did a shit job and I thought better. Considered getting one of those air-blasting siren thingys, so Arsewiper Jr could do more than honk the car horn in celebrating a further Swiss goal or even a Swiss win. Alas, we didn't even get to see another goal. Thankfully then, didn't buy the siren thingy. May just do so still, for Holland.
So, having beaten Spain, they couldn't muster anything against Chile, and certainly not the two they needed against Honduras. Any team that can't beat Honduras when they really need, forget about Spain, I suppose won't deserve to be in the last 16. How sad.
Note to Hitzfeld: practice scoring goals!!! (Note to self: Easier said than done, when your leading man upfront is a 35 year-old N'Kufo).
Spain-Chile. Chile started well enough, making Spain look all ragged and nervous. Pretty nice, I thought. Would be nice to see Spain squirm. And then it happened. The Chileans pressed a little button.
First, goalkeeping nightmare. Dude runs out for little reason, clears (or passes) the ball nicely to Villa, who finishes nicely from 40 yards or so. Goal out of the blue.
The thuggish Chileans then start to pile up the yellows, and soon enough, in the build up to Iniesta's second, the master thug Marco Estrada gets himself sent off. Game over. Even if they got a second, both sides figured rightly by half time that no way in hell Switzerland were going to score, and both were happy with things.
So now. Spain v Portugal. Yummy. Spain look ordinary when Villa's not involved (i.e. the first 20 minutes of the game), so Portugal will have much to be optimistic about. I mean, if Torres starts, Portugal are guaranteed at least one Spanish player who won't/can't score. Can't get better than that.
Chile v Brazil now too. Hmmm...I wonder...just how are Chile going to deal with Brazil. Difficult one that. Thankfully, they're running out of players with the yellows they've picked up. Thugs!
What a dull dull night. So what else is happening? Let's see...
Oh dear. Oh me. Oh my. Just as French politicians were forced to weigh in on the French debacle, so too have their Italian counterparts. Trust the Italians to be just as dramatic. Some guy blaming it on "luxury immigrants", being "paid millions, have legs made of jelly and are short of breath."
Wonder which immigrants on the pitch he was referring to. Didn't see any myself.
What more, according to the kind signore, "Italy's premature elimination is merely the result of an insane sports policy which has seen the league, the cup and the Champions League being won by teams who do not have a single Italian."
You know, much has been said about this too, in the context of the English Premier League. I've always tried to figure out the logic. By this, I suppose the end argument would be that the national team should be populated by the all best players from their own national league, right? And that the best domestic teams should be the place where the best nationals play at?
Let's look at Brazil. Starting line-up in their game against the Ivory Coast and current teams:
Cesar: Inter
Juan: Roma
Lucio: Inter
Michel Bastos: Lyon
Maicon: Inter
Felipe Melo: Juventus
Gilberto Silva: Panathinaikos
Luis Fabiano: Sevilla
Kaka: Real Madrid
Robinho: Man City? Santos? Whatever.
Elano: Galatasaray
Robinho notwithstanding, who still is a Man City player, none play in Brazilian league. So, would not one make the conclusion from this that the Brazilian league is populated by its lesser lights? If so...
You know what the real problem is? Not that the Italian league is over-populated by foreign players. Not that Milan has more foreigners than Italians. But that none of the Italian starting team currently play outside Italy. If I'm not wrong.
Shortest answer, though, is quite simple: You suck. France sucked. The French league is filled with French players, no? So what that does that mean? Should they not have done better than Italy? Geez.
To end on a nice happy note: our own Cesc has given the US a kindly look:
"The best moment for me at the World Cup so far was that nail biting end when the USA scored in the last minute against Algeria." Righty-ho. I agree, good sir.
"They have spirit too - they came from two goals down against Slovenia to get a draw and scored in injury time against Algeria to go through." Exactement!
"So I can see them reaching the semi-finals and then who knows what might happen." Who knows, who knows.
Let's see tomorrow!
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