Flamini is Histori. Piti.

[UPDATE: Looks like it's not quite a done deal yet. Le Boss has extended his deadline to Monday. Not sure whether that's a good or bad omen. Maybe it's just his agent squeezing a little bit more out of Milan. Is it coincidence though, that there's suddenly news of Gattuso wanting to come to England?]

Well, it looks like Flamini has said arrivederci to his team mates. Supposedly, his words were something along the lines of: "I have decided that I will be going to Milan." Similar last lines include:

"I've decided that I am gay, and I want a divorce."
"I've decided that I really like you...like a sister."
"I've decided that I'll be leaving you, and it's all for you. You need the space from me."
"I've decided that you're too good for me."

I hope Gallas told him in reply, "Vell, you can fouck off, Mathieu. You've always been zis fuggin' Italien, pretending to be a man, Francais, like me. Fouck off, and I 'ope you 'av a good time sitting on ze bench at a UEFA Cuup game against some sheet team next year. Merde!"

As you can tell, I've been thinking about this. Now why would he choose Milan? Definitely not Champions League football (erm, methinks Arse have got a place next year, not Milan. And I think we whipped them a short while ago). Definitely not the scudetto. (The last I counted, Milan were 23 points behind Inter. Arse are 4 behind). So, what could it be?

Let's be honest. The age of club loyalty is long gone. So what we're looking at is just some basic level of loyalty and gratitude. We have as given that these chaps will want to move on at some point, so it's a matter of time. What I'd have done is sign on to a new contract, and see how the next season goes with Arse. After all that he has put in, wouldn't he be at least curious to see how this team develops? Just one or two more seasons? He ain't that old. Then, if his stock rises, then by jove, it'd really rise. Imagine moving from a team that are Champions and/or European Champions. Of course, there is the possibility there he has no faith in either his or his team's ability.

So let's see, what are his real motivations? The £60,000 per week after tax? The £20 gazillion contract spread over 5 years - affordable since he's moving for free?

But the crux must be that he felt undervalued. Let me then say this: I have no doubt that in time, he will come to be overvalued at Milan. Come season 2010/2011, he should find himself kissing Sylvain Wiltord's old coach ass in the lower reaches of the French 2nd division. Niort sound like a good enough team? (I like the sound of it, actually!)

More ridiculous news. Avram the Alien's upset that Curbs likes Sir. Eeks! Curbs actually said something sweet about Sir and his team, and Avram the Alien's not happy. Well, what Curbs said may not have been the most clever, but since when have we judged West Ham managers by their intellect? Who cares what he says about "injustices" should Man U not win? But Avram's response is classic alien.

Doesn't the Alien just remind you of that fat kid who for some unknown reason nobody liked? Who then goes about trying to prove himself, being upset that despite the fact that he has all the coolest toys, nobody still likes him? Then goes and makes things worse by pissing everyone off? Hmm. Sounds right to me. Get a life, Alien. You're in the running for double. Be a man, stop crying and shut the #!@! up.