Hello? Could I Speak to Gareth, please?

We've made official enquiries into Gareth Barry's status. The phonecall between Pat Rice (PR)and some Villa coach (VC) went something like this:

PR: Hey man. Just what the hell is goin' on with Gareth and those clowns at Anfield?
VC: Who the fuck knows. Damn fools. Arguing over a couple of quid, bucks, euros, whatever.
PR: Yeah, tell me about it. Those bastards over at Milan are quibbling over a few bucks for Ade too. I mean, what's it with these idiots?
VC: Yeah, I mean, Ade is pure gold man. The best bloody striker the EPL has ever season. Worth every penny of a £120,000 wage. Wish we could afford him.
PR: I know. We really want to pay him that, but we just can't afford it too. We could afford Gareth though.
VC: That right?
PR: Yeah, for sure. Might be nice to have another Englishman.
VC: Alright then, you want me to tell Martin?
PR: Why not? Since that arsehole Flamini left, we haven't found anyone yet. That arse Hleb's leaving too, and unfortunatly we may be letting Gibby go too.
VC: Cool. Let me sort out this shit with Rafa and his twits. I'll get back to you.

So that was that. Let's see what happens. With Theo, Ramsey, now Barry, fuck, let's see Sepp Blatter talk out of his arse again.

Pool's bid to sell off Alonso has collapsed, so they may be sitting on someone with no extra cash. Funny. Didn't they like get a bomb for Crouch though? haha.

Speaking of Gibby Gilberto, looks like a deal's been made for £1m. Seems like a damn sad small small sum there. Wonder whether the boys ever stand naked in the shower comparing their transfer fees. Anyway, he's been a trooper, but his age has shown. All due thanks to Gibby for a good run.

An interesting list here of Le Boss' best 11 signings. Wouldn't say I disagree, except that Pires should be there, as 12th. The sub. Perhaps.